Monday, April 23, 2012

Hallmark Should Hire My High School Students

I am so pregnant right now. SO PREGNANT.


8.9 months pregnant. We took some 8 months pregnant pictures, but I think I need some 8.9 months pictures to forever commemorate the hugeness. Must get on that. Soon. Before I deflate.


Anywho, I was browsing through all of my draft posts trying to find something easy to blog that already had pictures uploaded and everything... Mostly so that I could continue to stall on revealing the *almost* finished nursery. I just have a few more projects to wrap up, promise! (Have I mentioned that I'm an experienced procrastinator?)


While browsing, I came across this post which I half wrote a few weeks after Joseph was born and then never shared. It's all about the cards that my high school students mailed to me right after I gave birth to Joseph two years ago. I completely forgot about them and now that I've looked through them, the nostalgia is trying to reach up and grab me by the throat. I'm a tad choked up at the silly sweetness and thought it would be appropriate to share it with you at this point in my current pregnancy. Enjoy!


*****


I received a pleasant surprise in the mail a few weeks after the little guy was born. My students (all 57 of them) had made us cards! Apparently they got really excited when I sent them pictures of our new arrival.




I had really, really sweet students second semester and we had a terrific teacher/class dynamic. I think it may have had something to do with the fact that I was visibly pregnant. Just a guess. High school students are very careful not to upset the pregnant lady. They fear the belly and the possibility of injury or birth within the classroom. FEAR. I blame Hollywood. Seriously. They are terrified that you will pop the baby out at every turn. They even came up with "The Plan" in case my water ever broke in class.


I'm not going to share all 57 cards with you, but I'm going to pick out some of my favorites and share them. Here goes:


...They call me...




...and I'm the...




...and this is an insight into the minds of my high school students. Let the cards begin...


"Whaaaaatttt? You were Pregnant?! (I never woulda noticed...) Congrats!"

High school students are not known for their tact:


"Thank God you popped that baby out."


But that's part of what makes teaching them so entertaining.

Their spelling can be atrocious and sometimes they don't make a whole lot of sense.

"So I herd you had a bebehz. I hope he lieks cheezburgerz  because this cheeseburger is amazingly delicious!" This reminds me a lot of my husband...


But they can always be counted on to reference Chuck Norris.


"Although I think you should have named him Chuck Norris so his naem would be Chuck Norris Meyers and y'know it just had a  kind of flow to it you know what I'm sayin' yo"


At some point during the semester, my students decided that it would be cool if my baby looked like Toad (the character from Super Mario). Why? No idea. But you have to admit that would be cool. In a freaky kind of way. As if that weren't enough, since I'm known amongst my students as the teacher who dances around whenever she gets excited about the subject matter, they decided my baby would be a dancing Toad... Hence, this card:


"A leperchaun toad dancing boy ;)" - leperchaun?? that sounds painful.
The dancing Toad trend continues throughout many of the cards...




(yes - that is my baby wearing a "gangsta" beanie) "He must have inherited it from his Mommy."


I really did dance and hop around a lot. I gesticulate wildly when I'm teaching. It makes everything way more entertaining and, if you are 8 months pregnant, it keeps your students attention. Students talking and won't quiet down? Hop up and down a few times. They immediately become convinced you are going to go into labor and promise to pay attention. ;)




Did you know that Joseph was born a Ninja?




"Ninja baby! Caution! No jumping with baby in hand!"

This is by far my favorite of all of the cards. It's the adventures of Superbaby!


This supposed to be me - does anyone else think it looks like Betty Boop?
"Did you know that your son is really..."


"A SUPERHERO!"


"...A mild-mannered photographer baby at day..."

"...but when duty calls... I'm slipping!! Ahhhh! *CATCH!* ...Superbaby appears!"

Sweetest package I think I've ever gotten. I love my students!


*****


I'm a little sad that I won't get ridiculous cards from high schoolers this time around, but at least I don't have any papers to grade, right? ;)

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