I have a confession to make.
I am... a plant murderer.
My crimes aren't intentional, mind you. It's just that I either over water or under water my plants.. My plants are usually either neglected entirely or smothered in misplaced love and concern. Poor little innocent plant souls.
It's ridonkulous! Our mother is a third generation gardener with a super green thumb. And it's not just me. My sister Amy has a similar problem. At least she has a philodendron named Alfred that she's managed to sustain for the last two years. Only because Alfred (and philodendrons in general) is a tough little guy.
It's very sad. My mother won't even give me plants anymore because I can never seem to keep them alive for very long. And I want to! I love having plants in my house. They bring a lot of cheer into a space.
I managed to keep a pot of Rosemary alive for over two years in college. Then some drunk college kid stole it from my balcony. Who the hell steals rosemary?!?! They probably thought it was pot. You can never trust college kids around your plants.
What shall I name him?
My sister-in-law Sarah has tons of plants in her home. Her living room is practically a jungle. And I'm envious of her ability to nurture and sustain the lives of so many plants.
So she and I have started an experiment. An experiment in plant ownership. She graciously gave me one of her living room plants for my home. This one, actually:
She informs me that it's very hard to kill. We'll see about that. So far, so good. If I manage to keep it alive for several months, then she'll give me yet another one of her plants. Won't that be exciting? It's a nice big fluffy one too. I really like it.
If all goes well, I can then proceed with Operation Houseplant and disperse plants all throughout my home. Oh, Operation Houseplant. How I long for thee.
Wish me luck! (Nagging would also be appreciated!)
Oh, and Sarah? Thank you for sharing your jungle with me. I look forward to living in the Amazon with you! We can ride jaguars off into the sunset together. Or just to Goodwill. But that is another story for another day.