Thursday, July 2, 2009

Gainful Employment

While speaking with my sister-in-law the other day, we got on the subject of the expenses involved in house repair & rehab.

Our shocking conclusion - it's expensive.


Actually, it really depends on the home improvement project.

There are what I designate as big projects and small projects.

So far, our big projects have been:
  • refinishing the downstairs floors
  • insulating the attic
  • installing kitchen cabinets, sink, etc.
  • making over the laundry room
There are many more big projects in our future:
  • completely remodeling both bathrooms
  • the Sandwich Shoppe
  • building a shed
  • etc.
But those projects will have to wait a while. They'll have to wait until we are no longer paying both rent and a mortgage... (We just paid our last month of rent!!)

They'll have to wait until I am gainfully employed again. However, such an event requires the school year start back up.

So in the mean time, I have devised a whole list of money-making schemes. Note: These schemes must be taken seriously. I would never jest about making money. (Click to enlarge)

1. I can work at Starbucks. I'm fully trained and have 2.5 years of experience. They just need to need employees.

2. Well, have you ever tried bat jerky? HMM? Have you?

3. According to my sister, I should avoid waitressing. The Professor doesn't like the idea either. Oh, fine. But I'm keeping my options open.

4. He's quite talented. We could be rich!! For some sampling of his artistic style, simply check out his blog at OnlyMeyers.

5. Trust me. I have experience at painting walls. I edge like a pro.

6. Bat juggling is an especially difficult skill to master. They are constantly trying to fly away. I could join the circus!

7. Home Depot. I have an interview tomorrow. I could look good in orange. Maybe...

8. People need blood. No matter that I carry the disease of the Mad Cow. MOOOOO. Shouldn't have lived in Germany from 1986-1989. I have an appointment Monday.

9.Yeah.. Something tells me I wouldn't last very long in construction. It could be fun. But the big burly guys with macho muscles would make fun of me when I couldn't lift stuff one-armed or win at arm wrestling.

10. Spider hunting is a great tradition amongst my siblings. It involves courage and honor. Sticks and big boots. My sisters and I would take down their webs with the sticks and stomp on the scrambling spiders with our boots. The spiders in Japan were scary. They needed stomping. Need someone to come and kill your spiders for you? I have the credentials.

So you see, I'm all set. I have plans. I'm going places.


Until I am yet again employed full-time, I plan to focus on the small projects. The projects that involve very little buying of items from Lowes, the use of tools that we already have, and lots of elbow grease.

Such as refinishing the banister or painting the three rooms that remain in the house. That's right, I've painted all but three of the main rooms of the house. And we have a lot of rooms. So close! (Except for the bathrooms. They don't count. They are on the big project list.)

Ok, back to being a professional contractor on my house.

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