Mister One Year Old

Laughing? You should be.

I can't even look at that picture without giggling hysterically.

Tee hee! I'm so proud. He's definitely Stephen's son. ;) Our big boy. Mister One Year Old.

That's right! Joseph turned 1 on April 4th. Over a month ago. I still have to remind myself that he's no longer a little baby. My how time flies!

We threw two parties to celebrate the little guy's first year of life. We had a small party at home on his actual birthday with my side of the family. I made the tastiest oatmeal cake on the planet. It was the same recipe that my Mom used for my little brother Marshall's first birthday.

Mr. Handsome Pants.

For his second party, we went up to NJ so that Stephen's side of the family could partake in the festivities. Joseph's Aunt Jamie made him a beautiful cake. Isn't it fabulous?

Joseph sure thought so. Smash! (Ok, in reality, he was tired and ready for bed at this point, so he spent most of his time intensely studying his smash cake.)

After two parties, the kid now has more toys than he knows what to do with. Spoiled, I tell you.

Seriously spoiled. He has his own fully operational battle station four wheeler. Color me jealous.

And he knows how to ride it too. He presses the button and it carries him into the nearest wall... We're still working on his steering skills (or lack thereof). I don't have any pictures of his riding skills because I always grab the camcorder instead of the camera whenever he's "speeding" down the hallway.

Joseph was born in a rush on Easter morning last year. During his first ever Easter egg hunt at his Aunt & Uncle's, I got all mushy inside thinking about how he had been a tiny little infant the previous Easter. And there he was. Eating jelly bean pieces. Right in front of me.

Yup. He's Mister One Year Old.

He started walking on Friday. From one end of the of the living room to the other. Stephen, Theresa, and I tossed his favorite stuffed animal back and forth to entice him. Each time he made it, he screamed in excitement. Too cute.

He likes to relocate items by placing them in drawers, buckets, and cabinets. I have a feeling that walking will only feed his relocating skills. He'll be jabbering away in another month. He says dada, mama, and will say hello if you hand him the phone. He's been imitating words and sounds like "woof woof".This week, he figured out how to use a straw. Drinking smoothies has never been so clean.

We said goodbye to the highchair when he turned one and graduated him to the booster seat at the table. Now, we just have to master utensils and not throwing our plate on the floor when we are done eating. Piece of cake...

The kid has 10 teeth. TEN at 13 months! And two of them are molars. Not bad when you consider that he started out with two teeth at 6 months. Of course, he now thinks biting is the shiznit. I wholeheartedly disagree. Tears ensue.

Joseph loves to dance. He rocks back and forth and bounces up and down to pretty much any tune. Even Chicka Chicka Boom Boom. Recently, he discovered Thriller.

Joseph got to do his first art project ever with Daddy last Friday while I was picking up furniture in Northern Virginia. I heart cavemen for inventing fingerpaint!

Note: Please pardon the quality of these photos. They were taken with our camcorder because I had taken the camera with me on my trip. They are just too cute to leave out!

Style. The kid has serious style.

And cheese. What a little ham!

Good thing they make non-toxic finger paints. Mr. Silly Pants got in a few tastes.

Stephen & Joseph surprised me with Joseph's masterful works of art after Mass & pancake breakfast with my Mom this morning. Stephen sat me down in the recliner, popped my feet up, tucked me in with a blanket, and showed me a video of Joseph's first fingerpainting experience.

I may have cried a little. It was so very sweet. I love my boys!

I'm totally framing these and hanging them on the wall. I'm pretty sure they are just what my living room needs.

So, Mister One Year Old, thank you for the fabulous present! I love you so much! (And thank you, Daddy, for making it happen!)

{Embrace} the Camera

Hey everyone!! It's Embrace the Camera Thursday and, yet again, self timer and continuous shoot are my heroes!! (Sorry Superman, but the truth is the truth.)




Reading to Joseph is so much fun now that he is interested enough to pay attention. Ok... Interested enough to grab at the pages of the book.

We've been reading "The Tiny Seed" by Eric Carle the last few days. He also wrote, "Brown Bear, Brown Bear What Do You See?" and "The Very Hungry Caterpillar," among other favorites. I really love how bright and colorful his art is (and so does Joseph!).

I am going to have some serious forehead wrinkles as an old woman. It will be SMOKIN' HOT!

Joseph likes to touch the pages while I read. He's even turned the pages a few times by accident. When we read smaller books, he grabs on where I'm holding the book. It makes it harder to turn the pages because he doesn't want to let go, but it's so cute!

Our current favorite book is "Barnyard Dance" by Sandra Boynton. I almost have the whole thing memorized.

"Clap your feet! Stomp your hands! Everybody ready for a barnyard dance!!" Whenever Stephen hears that line, he yells out that it doesn't actually rhyme. Silly husband. (Trix are for kids.)

Whatever. It's close enough. Besides, the rest of the book rhymes. "Bow to the horse. Bow to the cow. Twirl with the pig if you know how!" Do you know how to twirl with a pig? I think it would be rather difficult. Just think about it. Pigs are seriously cumbersome. And all of that mud has got to make them slippery. I really don't think pigs are twirl material.

Did you know that you can also find children's books online? My new favorite online books to read to Joseph are the bluebison.net stories by Hayes Roberts. I can't decide which I like more  - "The Wiener Dog Magnet" or "The Brave Monkey Pirate." His illustrations and storylines crack me up. You should DEFINITELY go read them. They are great for both adults and kids.

credit

(The site also includes fun printable coloring books here.)

Come on? How can you resist that illustration??

Another favorite activity of ours is to sit on the front porch and watch the cars and trucks drive by. As soon as Joseph hears one coming, he turns his head towards it and then follows it's movement until it's out of sight. He does this over and over. When he gets a little older, we'll start calling out colors and types of vehicles. Those chicken trucks should be very interesting...

Inspired by his striped pants, I decided to tell him a story today. (I do this often when I run out of things to talk to him about.)

"Once upon a time, in a faraway land called Vir-jinny, amidst the tall, dark mountains, there lived a scary baby monster named Joseph. The poor tigers in the land quaked in fear at the very mention of his terrible name. Whenever Joseph got tired, he would stomp throughout the land rubbing his eyes and letting out ferocious roars that would shake the very mountains. One day, a brave little tiger came up to Joseph and asked him to stop roaring. The little tiger just couldn't get to sleep above all the racket. The mean, grumpy Joseph ignored the little tiger's request and sat down on top of the tiger, squishing him flat. From that day forward, Joseph the baby monster stomped around the land with a squished tiger on his diapered butt.  Sometimes, Joseph's mommy made him wear a squished tiger bib to match his tiger-ed bottom (he was a hapless victim of baby fashion). Showing no mercy, the baby monster Joseph would drool all over the bib until it was soaking wet. After all, he was a baby drool monster and that's what baby drool monsters do. Outraged by the horrible actions of Joseph the baby drool monster, the tigers of the land had him arrested. They forced him to wear striped pajamas and put him in baby drool monster prison. There, finally behind bars, Joseph the baby drool monster was forced to serve his sentence sleeping. Peace finally returned to the land and Joseph was never allowed to squish or drool on a tiger again. The end."

Don't worry. Joseph isn't always the villain in our stories... Sometimes he's very heroic and goes about rescuing mommy damsels in distress. Then he gets rewarded with smooches.

And sometimes, we pretend we're living in a musical and we sing about everything we do throughout the day. "Oh, folding laundry is fun! Folding laundry is fun! Hi ho the merry-o, folding laundry is fun!" Poor kid has to listen to his mother sing... It's ok, little man. Between the smooches and the singing, I'd try to eat my face too.

Embrace the camera, people, and embrace the crazy!

Eye Believe in the Awesome Powers of Breast Milk

Earlier this month, I took the little guy into the pediatrician's office for his 4 month check up.

Good news: Joseph is healthy.
Unsurprising news: Joseph thinks shots are the devil.
Bad news: I woke up the next morning with my left eye glued shut by sleep crusties.

I swear I'll never touch anything in the pediatrician's office again. Cross my heart.

After a quick visit to the family doctor, my suspicions were confirmed. I had conjunctivitis.

Yes! Pink eye! That means they'll send me home from school today!!

Oh, wait... I'm not 6. Damn it! There's no advantage to having pink eye when you are a grown up. Stupid growing up.

The drops were helpful, but a week later, the pink eye was back.

IN BOTH EYES!! ARGH!

I should really stop touching my eyes. I should really be more diligent about using my drops. I should really move to Antarctica where I can't get pink eye at pediatrician's offices. I should really be friends with the penguins. They don't get pink eye. Right?

Fortunately for me, my savvy PA sister-in-law, Mrs. 5C, was visiting this past weekend. I lured her to my sketch-tastic home with promises of chocolate cheesecake and miles upon miles of yard sales. (And boy did I deliver! More on that tomorrow...)

Anyways. Back to pink eye, the scourge of my habitual eye rubbing existence.

 Mrs. 5C took one piteous look at me and said, "Oh my, are you ok? Is there something wrong with your eyes??"

"Pink eye." I muttered sadly.

"Oh...Just use breast milk."

"SAY WHA?!?!?" My itchy, gooey, puffy, pink eyes widened in disbelief. I couldn't have heard her right. Could I?

"Just put a few drops of your breast milk in your eye about 3 times a day and it should be gone in 24 hours. It worked for Jamie and her family."

Uh huh. Sure. I think it's time to have Mrs. 5C committed. Breast milk in the eye. Ridiculous. No way, Jose.

Oh fine. I'll try it. I guess. She's a savvy PA after all. She knows her stuff. Even if she's a weirdo.

Several drops of breastmilk, one envious baby, one grossed out husband, and 24 hours later, I was cured!

I believe in the awesome powers of breast milk. It can fatten up babies. It can soothe soar nipples. It can cure the pox that is pink eye. Hallelujah, I believe!

Amen.

(Thanks, 5C! Eye love you!)

Milk Drunk Baby

This, my friends, is a milk drunk baby:

That little gummy smirk of absolute contentment on that chubby little sleeping face is a direct result of a very full belly, 7.5 hours of uninterrupted sleep, and fluffy down pillows.

Yes. I said 7.5 hours of sleep. SEVEN POINT FIVE!!!

Excuse me while I prance around the house.

And shout my utter joy to the heavens.

And make pancakes.

And listen to oom pah pah.

Here's something that I never thought about...

When my baby sleeps for 7.5 hours, he wakes up hungry. I, on the other hand, wake up with boobs as hard as rocks. Very, very full boobs.

When hungry baby with no self restraint meets rock hard boobs of sleepy mommy at 4 am, something strange and unexpected happens within the depths of that baby's belly.

The milk does not fit. With one big belch, it OVERFLOWS. I'm not talking about your standard spit up. I'm talking fill up a 32 oz Nalgene bottle with breast milk and dump it on your chest. With several upchuck aftershocks.

Two mommy outfits, one grandmommy outfit, two baby outfits, two diapers, a grounding, and lots of laughter later, we had a sleeping, milk drunk angel who had slept through the night.



Now, mommy just has to learn to put herself to bed when baby goes to sleep, instead of staying up past midnight.

Thank you to the guardian angels of baby/mommy sleep!